Monday, June 23, 2008

I can't touch things that are true...

Kaiinstall ko lang ng Google Earth on my laptop just to show my father what it can do. Hayon, punta kaming Paris, Cairo at kung san-san pa. When he went out of my room (baka napagod at di na-keri ang kata-travel),I decided to stay on Google Earth for a few more minutes. It's statistically expected for me to visit Korea, and I ended up landing on Daejeon University. Though the map isn't updated to 2007 geography (andaming kulang na buildings sa DJU) it made me recall Aslan's line in Chronicles of Narnia Prince Caspian:

"Things never happen the same way twice."

Point is: We need to grow in many different ways. But I'm such a creature of habit...

I know for a fact that kahit maglulupasay pa ko sa loob ng subway, when I get back to Korea again, things will never be the same for a number of reasons. Worst thing that could happen when I'm already there is when these words are pushed from my mouth: I had been better off in the Philippines.

Yeah, I shouldn't be expecting a fairy tale-themed life in this life. That's why I made a wish in my previous post.

Life on Film

A movie that is too long is a boring movie; you just want to cut it short and continue watching it later (you might not even want to do that). Is life not at all different? I have lived for two decades and a year and--for another decade or so--I cannot see my self doing the routinary mess that 'surprises' me everyday. Yes, I have a good family, I did well as a student, I have an easy and relatively high-paying job, I am surrounded by great people. Yet I want to have a lifespan of a butterfly. Each stage of their lives are well-demarcated. There is no confusion. Butterflies know no angst.

I yearn to live a life that's short and extremely eventful. I know it can't happen. And I can only wish in my hearts of hearts that I'd be reincarnated not as a person, but as a character in a soap opera about romantic love. I know I'm crazy. But come to think of it. As a persona in a soap, in 24 hours you have done what a centenarian has done in his lifetime. There is character development, you know your role, your purpose. You'll be able to travel to a lot of places, to be romantically loved, to be hurt and recover as if recovery is the next fastest thing to light...Yeah, I'd like to live in a soap opera. I don't wanna get tired. I don't wanna get sick and be confined for a long time. I don't wanna wear diapers or face the threat of being put in Home for the Aged. Yet I want to enjoy life, even if it is for just a short time. And isn't it that happiness, even in real life, ephemeral? So why not just live it on film?